What Do You Miss?

Being an expat living abroad many people have asked me what do I miss the most from back home in the U.K.?

Apart from the obvious answer: my family and friends, there are only a few other things that I truly do miss... some are still with me on a daily basis that I simply cannot say goodbye to (like English Tetley teabags, My Monthly Dvd Magazines along with any Dvd's from the U.K. that I can't get here) that are all sent to me each month - Thanks Dad! :) - what would we do without our parents eh?!

Other things I do miss are: Branston Pickle, Piccalilli, McVities Digestive biscuits, McVities Chocolate Covered Homewheat Biscuits, McVities Cream Crackers, Custard Cream Biscuits, Bourbon Biscuits, Cadbury's Flake, Cadbury's Cream Eggs, Rowntree's Turkish Delight, Smarties, Rowntree's Bon Bons, Rowntree's Rolos, Cola Bottles, Colman's Mustard, Bread Pudding, Bird's Eye Custard, Flapjacks, Crumpets, Marks & Spencer ready meals and many toiletries and certain brand hairgels that seem exclusive to Europe - it's a shame that The Body Shop and Boots don't exist here!

Since living here I have either said goodbye to all of the above permanently or replaced it with something Brazilian that is just as good, or sometimes isn't so good but there is just no other choice available... Luckily I am the kind of person that adapts very easily to new surroundings and I get used to new things extremely quick and can go without the "normal necessities" that most people need, or indeed think they need.

Some of the things on my list have a connection with memories that can never be replaced and I do admit to missing them enormously, especially as a lot of them remind me of my childhood... Sitting at the kitchen table with my Nan, cup of tea in one hand and two Custard Cream Biscuits in the other. Memories of "dunking" the biscuit in my tea for a couple of seconds too long and ending up with a stodgy mess at the bottom of the cup and trying to fish most of it out with a small teaspoon! My Nan saying to me: "I told you not to leave it in too long you silly sod!!" Ahh memories! All frozen in time, along with my long-gone and much-adored Grandmothers.

Then I'm 20 years old, eating hot buttered crumpets whilst sitting by the fire reading the Sunday newspapers that my Dad got hot off of the press at his work the night before and watching some crappy early morning television programme after a drunken Saturday night ritual (London nightclubbing with the usual gang of friends) Arriving home and realising that the post-club veggie burger that I bought in "Costa's late night cafe" on the Kings Road wasn't sufficient enough to take away my enormous hunger and so, as usual, I raid the kitchen food cupboards for my favourite things as the morning light appears.

Years later I'm sitting with my Mum in the living room of my apartment in London the night before I came to Brasil, drinking cups of hot tea with her, chatting and reminiscing about things that have happened to us in the past, good things, bad things, happy and sad, laughing and crying with her and not wanting that night to ever end thinking about the following day's unbearably sad goodbye at the airport, where we would be clinging to each other until the final boarding call almost realising that we would never get to see each other again.

Needless to say that we never slept that night, instead staying awake talking about everything that we could think of and playing "eye spy" until the sun rose the next morning. "You will be coming home to see us next Christmas won't you Son?! Promise me you will!" "Yes Mum, of course! I promise!"

Sadly I never made it home that Christmas, it was my Mum's last... I'd almost ran out of money and was busy looking to find work teaching English to pay my bills and my rent to survive, things that seem so irrelevant now.

My Dad later said to me that I was the luckiest person out of all of us in our family as I was the one with all the happy memories of Mum, the way that she should be remembered, always laughing, always beautiful, always healthy. Some memories can never be erased and never should be. Some people say we need to look forward to the future, which is true, but this doesn't mean that the past should be forgotten, memories remind us where we came from and what we are... all the good things, bad things and truly terrible things in life mould us and shape us and make us unique and I wouldn't be the person that I am today without them.

So, being a really non-materialistic person, I get to the end of this text and what do I miss? I miss the irreplaceable, most other things seem so futile when put against what really matter most in life; people, family, loved ones and a really nice cup of English tea!